16-year-old refuses to cook meals for his 9, 10, and 13-year-old siblings and his parents despite their insistence: 'I don't want to make 4 meals every dinner and I know nobody would appreciate'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Oct 22, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

There are some household duties that typically constitute a kid's chores; cleaning your room, taking out the trash, and doing the dishes are chores kids of any age can do. Cooking dinner every night for your entire family is typically not one of the classics, but that was a chore assigned to a 16-year-old boy with a passion for cooking. He started by cooking meals for his grandparents when he was recovering from surgery. He wanted to show his appreciation for their hospitality and to flex some of the muscles he was working out in his home economics class. His grandparents took him in because his siblings are so rambunctious, it might've been unsafe for him to live with them when he was still fragile in recovery.

Cooking for two adults and one teenager is much less work than cooking for two children, two teens, and two adults. And yet his parents thought it would be appropriate to ask him to cook meals for the entire family from now on. They weren't even asking for just dinner; they wanted three meals a day plus snacks.

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  • Caucasian man cooking in the kitchen
    via Curated Lifestyle (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Teenagers should not be the ones to solve their parents' budgeting problems. The parents in this story want their kid to cook all of their meals at home because they spend so much money on takeout, but they're too lazy to cook for themselves. It is actually preposterous. 

  • Am I the bad guy for not cooking for my parents and siblings when I cooked for my grandparents when I stayed there after my surgery?

    I (16M) stayed with my (maternal) grandparents for 3.5 months so | could recover from surgery without issues. The reason I stayed with them instead of going home to my parents (40s) and siblings (13, 10 and 9) is because two of my siblings (13 and 9) have special needs and don't always respect personal space and my other sibling (10)
    via u/Skylarnay
  • acts out for attention because our parents are so focused on our other two siblings. There was a pretty big risk of me getting hurt if I recovered at home. My parents didn't wanna accept that at first but my grandparents kept pressing the issue until my parents gave in.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • Man in red and black jacket sitting on black couch
    via Pietro Schellino

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Confession! I stayed with my grandparents longer than I needed to. I could have moved back home after two months without risking getting my surgery spot hurt. But I liked living with my grandparents. It was so peaceful and I got to spend time with the adult figures in the home instead of only.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • seeing my parents when they told me to do something or sent me to pick up food for everyone. It was also great not being woken up at 4am by a sibling (10) throwing a tantrum or coming home to a sibling messing up my stuff (9).
    via u/Skylarnay
  • When I started to feel better I asked my grandparents to let me cook for them. I had learned some recipes over two years but only got to try them out in school (home economics) and that was only one time. My grandparents said I could as long as I took it easy at first and they really liked the stuff I made for them and I liked cooking for them. Eventually
    via u/Skylarnay
  • I had to go home because my parents kept asking and they kept visiting unannounced and checking in to see when I'd be coming home. The last couple of times they dropped by they saw me make dinner for me and my grandparents.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • My grandparents offered to have me stay and take one kid off their hands but my parents said no and they warned of consequences if I didn't come back home. Not only for me but for my grandparents too. So I moved back home. It's been a couple of months since | got back home and things are back to normal and not the good kind.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • Brown and white concrete house near green trees under blue sky during daytime
    via Johnson

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • For the first two weeks everything was fine like before but then my parents asked me why I never cook for us and how come I was making meals for my grandparents and I wouldn't do it for them and my siblings. They told me if I'm able to do it in one house I can do it in another and it would save them money on takeout. I told them I don't want
    via u/Skylarnay
  • to make 4 meals every dinner and I know nobody would appreciate it. They told me that's too bad. and I shouldn't need appreciation because you do chores because and not for recognition. I said they don't even cook like that and we get takeout so what's the big deal and they said takeout is expensive and I could save us hundreds of dollars a week.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • I didn't start cooking for them and my parents did buy some stuff and tell me to cook but I refused. The reaction out of my siblings when they saw the stuff my parents bought was ew gross and they wouldn't eat that. It was chicken, potatoes and veggies that got that reaction and all of them were still packaged.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • My parents told me I'm not a very good son or brother and helping my family should make me feel good about myself and they said I want to be selfish instead. AITAH?
    via u/Skylarnay
  • Jaeniver Your parents could save themselves lots of money if they let you stay with your grandparents. NTA
    via u/Jaeniver
  • Bella-1999 But then they would lose their free labor! Being out of the house working or at the library studying can be an excellent strategy to avoid being their house elf. OP, start getting ready to leave the moment you hit 18. If your grandparents are still able to house you then, so much the better.
    via u/Bella-1999
  • In the meantime, start assembling all of your ID documents and saving money. Try as much as possible to store it somewhere your folks and siblings can't get at. You have my best wishes.
    via u/Bella-1999
  • SpcyLama You're not the AITA, you're a teenager who finally got to experience peace, respect, and appreciation. Cooking for people who value you is love; being expected to serve people who drain you is exploitation. You don't owe your parents the same care they never gave you.
    via u/SpcyLama
  • Select-Negotiation87 Funny accusing you of not being a very good son or brother since they are clearly not very good parents. NTA. Let the parents cook or sort out dinner. I hope you get to visit your grandparents often.
    via u/Select-Negotiation87
  • Skylarnay OP They're just ordering takeout as normal. They haven't cooked in years. I still visit my grandparents. But I don't stay as long as I'd like because it bothers my parents.
    via u/Skylarnay
  • Baudica Less than 2 years left. Talk to your grandparents and see if they're ok with you moving in permanently, the day of your 18th birthday. NTA If you want to save up, you could track the take out budget, and offer to cook for that same budget. One shared meal. Not different for everyone. But you don't have to. Your their child. They should be providing meals for you, not the other way around.
    via u/Baudica

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family drama meals cooking brother teenagers siblings grandma raising teens dad dinner Grandpa family grandparents food sister grandson mom
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